Have you ever felt like you’re out of words, that you don’t have anything to say or anything new to add to the conversation? Have you ever felt emptied out and ready to just rest from going after your dreams and goals? Like you want to sit on the sidelines and watch for a little while and just be present to what other people have to say and what other people are doing? In many ways that’s where I’ve been for the past year. I haven’t shared many words here because I haven’t had many to say. I’ve been contentedly cheering on other people’s bucket lists (my kids’ in particular) from the sidelines.
But now I’m finding more words to say and an eagerness to get back in the game. And I think in large part that’s due to other people’s words. In a nutshell, it’s because of books. So I thought I’d share with you a bit of what I’m reading now and how these other people’s words are inspiring my bucket list.
First Ask Why: Raising Kids to Love God Through Intentional Discipleship by Shelly Wildman
This parenting book by my friend and fellow Redbud Writer launches today! I attended her book launch this weekend and am so excited to see this book get out into the world. What I love about it is that the parenting wisdom Shelly shares isn’t a one-size-fits-all dogma. Rather, she invites parents to think. To think about the reasoning behind what they do in their family, and to approach parenting with intentionality. Shelly is a Christian and her faith infuses this book, so the topics she covers are naturally those connected to faith. What I found so compelling about this book compared with any other parenting book, is how it convicted me. It prodded at the areas in my own life where I need to make changes in order to be a better parent (like my own occasional lack of self-control).
One topic that stood out to me in particular was the distinction Shelly makes between being nice and being kind. She says, “we act nicely because we want to be perceived positively, but we act kindly because of a deeper motivation of the heart. Everyone can be nice, but not everyone is kind.” She goes on to describe kindness further this way, “Kind people notice. Kind people look you in the eye and treat you with respect and honor. Their motivation is simply you.” I want to raise children who become kind adults, not just nice ones.
Like Shelly and her husband, Mike & I have been intentional about rearing our daughters. But what I love about this book is that it has given me so much more to chew on and so many more ways to pour into my girls, even as the years they remain in our home are so fleeting.
Bucket List Inspirations:
- seek out an opportunity to serve with my family – we all volunteer individually, but after reading this, I feel like we’re missing this piece of shared service. Even if it isn’t in an official capacity, I’d love to be able to serve together.
- look for one or two ways to create intentional family memories during the brief times we have all three of our girls under our roof (when the eldest is home on college breaks).
The Little Paris Bookshop by Nina George
What a treasure this book is! I just finished listening to the audiobook (which I wholeheartedly recommend for the pleasure of hearing the French lilts of the actors’ voices that draw you further into the setting of the story). It is the story of Jean Perdu and the love he lost. The titular bookshop is not a place, but rather a floating “book barge,” Perdu’s “Literary Apothecary,” where he treats maladies of the soul with prescriptive reading. And so we follow Perdu as he casts off from Paris, following the waterways of France, past town after delightful town, collecting a cast of characters and plumbing emotional depths.
George’s writing is so evocative, with phrases like this one describing the Avignon landscape, “He saw sand-colored houses, scattered like dice on the green and red and yellow patchwork, as in an old painting.” It was a lush book, and I credit it, more than any other, with loosening my tongue and allowing words to flow again.
Bucket List Inspirations:
- to visit Cuisery, the town in Burgundy where “the book is king.” George describes a fantasy convention here packed with “people dressed up like their favorite character or author.”
- to learn more about Sanary-sur-Mer, the seaside town in Provence where German writers and intellectuals fled during the 1930’s.
- to read a few of the classics mentioned by bookseller Perdu, such as A Picture of Dorian Grey or The Elegance of the Hedgehog.
White Awake: An Honest Look At What It Means to Be White by Daniel Hill
I’m reading this book as part of a journey into greater cultural competence and awareness of racial injustice. What I appreciate about this book is how Hill describes the stages white people go through as they make the journey from ignorance to compassion regarding race and white privilege in our country. It proved particularly helpful recently when I learned of a situation in which a white friend who is compassionate and eager to make a difference for people of color was publicly humiliated by another white woman. I immediately thought of Hill’s words about a white person he encountered who had gotten stuck in their journey in a place of despising other white people; loving only people of color.
According to Hill, white people journey through seven stages in the cultural identity process: encounter, denial, disorientation, shame, self-righteousness, awakening, and active participation. I appreciate this as a road map for what to expect of my journey (even if it isn’t linear) and even more so for better understanding and appreciation for where other people are on their own journey of transformation.
Bucket List Inspirations
- read 2 or 3 of the authors of color that he refers to in this book, like Soong-Chan Rah, Beverly Tatum, and Christena Cleveland.
- visit some of the sites of the Civil Rights movement in America, such as Woolworth’s in Greensboro, NC, the Edmund Pettus Bridge in Selma, AL and multiple sites in Birmingham, AL (not that Hill refers to these places).
